I know my worth: I Know My Worth

Four words. Doesn’t seem like much at first glance. After you dig deeper into this phrase, however, one will find that there is so much wrapped up in these four little words. As a young, well relatively (I am knocking on 30’s door), black woman, this phrase is one that I hold near and dear to my heart. Why? Because as young black women, we are not told enough that we are worthy. We do not hear that we are priceless, irreplaceable, and worthy of respect and love, real love. Not just romantic love but agape love, enduring love, indescribable love.

I consider myself blessed. Growing up, I had wonderful images of both black women and men around me. I was taught young that I was special, a child of God, made in his image, and by learning and understanding that, I understood that I was worthy of respect. While this revelation did not fully protect me from bad and dysfunctional relationships, it allowed me to eventually recognize those dysfunctional relationships for what they were.

While it is a powerful thing to hear from another individual what you are worth, tis infinitely powerful to know that for yourself. Proverbs 31:10 tells us that a virtuous woman’s worth is even higher than that of rubies. When a woman recognizes that she is a precious gem, she will walk and talk accordingly. To that end, she will not allow friends, men, or acquaintances to treat her in any manner that contradicts with her worth.

People often ask me how I knew my husband was “the one.” I usually laugh. One because women often think that moment of recognition is like something out of a movie, and two because for me realizing he was the man God had sent me was a prayerful, purposeful process. Having this conversation with my single friends always leads to me reflect on what was different about him, or his approach. This reflection leads to the same simple answer. He loved me the way that I was, and he loved me first. How does this relate to knowing one’s worth? Well, so many relationships before were about me trying to convince a man to love me. They involved me doing the courting or chasing. These men before my husband did not accept me the way I was. They wanted to change something about me, whether it was my weight, my height, my morals, my personality, and the list could go on and on. My husband was different. He recognized right away the priceless gem he had found, and he did not want to change a thing about me. He went out of his way to show his love and care for me because he knew I was worthy.